I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
