its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
