The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
