I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
