He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
