You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
