we have pet lesbian snakes
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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