I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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