Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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