You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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