It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
