I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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