Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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