You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize