On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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