I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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