uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
