Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
This is my gift to your gina
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
