doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
