nut hugger
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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