My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
