You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
