these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize