Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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