so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
