I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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