..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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