Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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