She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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