come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
