the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize