im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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