So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
i now understand why vodka
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
