Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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