I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Randomize
