Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
How external is "for external use only"?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
