i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
either way he was missing a nipple.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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