Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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