Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
