I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
