Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
