They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize