Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
