I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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