i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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