tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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