they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
