What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
