eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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