Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize