Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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