i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
