i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
