the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
